And that's a wrap. Today could well mark the day I finish sitting exams for good. Although I've been up before the birds, I wasn't feeling up to the mark and the paper didn't go my way, I'm trying to look on the bright side, which is something I seldom do when it comes to education and the expectations I set for myself. I am most definitely my own worst critic and never seem satisfied with what I have achieved. Comparing myself to others is second nature, I always believe I could have earned that extra one or two percent and never really take the time to look at all that has gone right for me on my educational CV.
This might be a day for the history book of me, and despite feeling like a jetlagged Dementor and still recovering from Monica Geller stress levels, I'm going to give myself a break and look at things from the flipside for once. The months of May and June might never more be synonymous with days locked away in my bedroom with cups of tea on tap. Tans might no longer be reserved for the lucky souls unshackled by mindmaps and backache. Highlighters could once again be a beauty tool to extenuate cheekbones instead of forgotten facts. Today has got to be some kind of win.
Considering I've spent every year since the tender age of 14 sitting official exam after exam on Pythagoras, plant sap, the Brontes, hurricanes to the Titanic, the end of exams has been a long time coming. It really is only fair that my poor brain should be given a rest and is able to focus on the perfectly satisfying inane. I think I've earned the right to indulge in guilty pleasures, immerse myself in the addictive drama that the Kardashians so effortlessly provide, with the most strenuous mental activity on the agenda deciding between watching another episode of Billions or Quantico.
Exams are tough opponents, and are ones which I am hopefully done contending with. They have been familiar foes, and ones which I shall miss with the same level of affection as the extra nine pounds I put on last year or my teenage braces. Yet, I must give them some credit, because without them I'd have never got into The University of Reading, the stomping ground where I really got to find my feet and spread my wings. I was able to study History, a subject I love, I met some wonderful people and earned myself a BA. Exams helped me onto my Masters in Magazine Journalism at Cardiff University, where I can honestly say I've started to feel like a proper writer. So exams, let's make a truce and say we're frenemies. I've put up with you for a good part of a decade, but I never want to see you again.
From here on out, I'm hoping that if I must be tested, I'll face tests of character, tenacity and skill which don't require candidate numbers or an encyclopaedic knowledge of the Victorians through to the IPSO code. I'm hoping that today is the first day where I can stop judging myself by the education system's definition of intelligence and be proud that I made it through to the other side with only dark circles and a stronger glasses prescription for battle wounds. My parents have always told me that education isn't about grades or numbers, but how you apply yourself with the grades and numbers you have. Maybe the real test is about realising that there will always be someone better and brighter than you, but that's okay, that's how the real world works. Perhaps it's important to realise that exam results are not the end of the world and that character, tenacity and skill will be far better tools than a 70% in carving yourself a badass place in it.
From here on out, I'm hoping that if I must be tested, I'll face tests of character, tenacity and skill which don't require candidate numbers or an encyclopaedic knowledge of the Victorians through to the IPSO code. I'm hoping that today is the first day where I can stop judging myself by the education system's definition of intelligence and be proud that I made it through to the other side with only dark circles and a stronger glasses prescription for battle wounds. My parents have always told me that education isn't about grades or numbers, but how you apply yourself with the grades and numbers you have. Maybe the real test is about realising that there will always be someone better and brighter than you, but that's okay, that's how the real world works. Perhaps it's important to realise that exam results are not the end of the world and that character, tenacity and skill will be far better tools than a 70% in carving yourself a badass place in it.
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